Dribble Drabble
by Twin Exchange
Summary: A Collection of Drabbles in response to a challenge set on the Twin Exchange Forum. Updated Monthly!
1. Stiff Cat

_A/N – Dribble Drabble is a challenge that takes place once a week on the Twin Exchange Forum (see profile for links and information). Every Monday/Tuesday, depending on your location, a new quote from the Harry Potter books or movies is posted and anyone is invited to write a drabble in response to what the characters could or should have said in that situation. Each chapter is a different quote, so hop on over the forum if you feel like giving it a go!_

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**Dribble Drabble**

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Chapter 1

_"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly." Dumbledore, Pg.9, PS._

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Stiff Cat, Stiff Hat

"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly." Dumbledore smiled down at the feline beside him, her face looking up at him shrewdly in the moonlight.

"May I say Albus, that I have never seen your hat sit so stiffly either." Transforming, she pursed her lips, eyeing his towering hat that pointed unnaturally skyward.

"You like it? I placed a body bind on Fawkes for easy storage … just incase I needed him," The Headmaster informed her happily. The witch was about to respond when a bright light appeared and a large motorcycle began to descend from the sky.

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_Author:_ WeasleyForMe

Balls of Yarn

"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly," Dumbledore casually mentioned to the head of Gryffindor House as she transformed into her human shape in front of the Dursley residence.

Professor McGonagall stood just as stiffly next to him, chin held high. "I suppose you take me for the sort that would prance about with a ball of yarn?" she questioned huffily.

"Of course not, my dear Minerva," he responded, not bothering to conceal his amused smile. "No, obviously not a ball of yarn, but perhaps a rubber mouse?"

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

I'm Not the Only One

"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly," Dumbledore casually mentioned hiding his smirk as the witch beside him transformed back into human form.

Minerva McGonagall looked around the empty moonlit street as if to make sure no one was spying on them before replying _(Blushing as she spoke) _"Well I'm not the only one whose 'stiff ' tonight" While speaking glancing down towards his pants that were hidden underneath his colourful robes.

"My, my Mini what a naughty girl!" Dumbledore said his bright blue eyes twinkling.

Minerva pursed her lips sexily before licking them and saying "My house or yours?"

Dumbledore smiled and said "What about the my office? We've never tried there before."

Minerva smiled as she moved towards Dumbledore, as she reached him, Dumbledore put his hand around her waist and they both apparated away, completely forgetting about little Harry Potter.

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Slipped

"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly," Albus Dumbledore told Minerva McGonagall after she had transformed back into her witchy self.

Minerva pursed her lips in annoyance before replying "Well you would be stiff too, if you had spent the night before with Severus. Oh sorry, I forgot you have no idea what I'm talking about as your still a virgin!"

Minerva gasped and put her hands over her mouth horrified by what she just let slip to one of the most powerful wizards in the world.

Albus also stood there shocked, unable to say anything, nobody had spoken to him like that in over fifty years!

They both stood in an uncomfortable silence, Minerva sweating waiting for Albus to speak, but was saved when a bright light appeared and a large motorcycle descended towards them from the sky.

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Outward Appearances

Albus Dumbledore approached the cat, standing proud on the garden fence and smiled, "My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly,"

The cat did not respond, so he tried again, "Come now Minerva, I am not that late ... you see Mundungus was having a few celebr-"

"Headmaster? You do realize you are talking to a lawn ornament?" A clipped voice choked behind him. Professor Dumbledore turned and smiled at his favourite Transfiguration teacher and began his conversation all over again.

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_Author:_ Mistymist

Unmentionables

"My dear Professor, I've never seen a cat sit so stiffly." Albus Dumbledore observed as he made his way towards number 4 Privet Drive.

Suddenly a very stern looking woman appeared beside him looking for all intents and purposes to be removing her undergarments from her unmentionable area.

"You would be to Headmaster if you had, had a fence post stuck up your derriere for 6 hours too" she did not look happy about this at all.

The headmaster's brow furrowed and an unpleasant shiver ran up his spine "Indeed" he muttered before returning his attention to the night sky.


	2. Neighbours

Chapter 2

_"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Molly Weasley "What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?"_

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_Author:_ Panny

Family Secrets

"You're a prefect?" Mrs. Weasley squealed loudly. "Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!"

"What are Fred and I?" George grumbled teasingly. "Next door neighbours?"

Their mother looked at the twins briefly before turning to her husband. "Oh dear. Arthur, I thought you had told them."

"No, Molly. We agreed that it should be you."

"So, after all these years…"

"Mum?" Both Fred and George were looking between their parents rather anxiously. Finally their mother turned to them.

"Well, you see, twins don't actually run in the family but we wanted some and Mr. Lovegood had these two baby boys…"

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_Author: _Mistymist

The Truth of the Matter

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Molly exclaimed as she hugged Ron tightly.

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George asked in a huff.

Molly pulled away from Ron, her eyes darting between her husband and the twins.

Arthur gave a small nod and said softly "It is time they knew the truth"

"What truth?" Fred asked "What is he on about Mum?"

"I didn't want you to find out like this but you deserve the truth. During the first war I had a brief affair with our Milkman and nine months later you two arrived."

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Swedish Backpackers

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Mrs. Weasley cried, jumping up to hug her youngest son, before smoothing his hair and helping him pin on his badge.

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George cried, indignant.

"Well, actually your father and I have been meaning to talk to you about that …" Molly said, busying herself fixing Ron's badge.

"What?" the Twins asked in unison.

"Well, we have hired your room out to some Swedish backpackers, so it seems you will have to move out," she shrugged, before returning to her cooking, humming happily.

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_Author:_ WeasleyForMe

Twins Again

Ron made his announcement, a bit nervous because the twins were in the room.

Mrs. Weasley barely let him finish before shrieking with joy. "You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!"

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George protested.

Mrs. Weasley turned her attention to twins and examined them sadly. "Actually boys, your father is building a small shed on the lot next door for both of you." She gently rubbed her round belly. "It seems there will be a new set of twins arriving soon… perhaps _they'll_ be prefects."

All of the Weasley children gasped and fainted.

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

That's why I don't like Lucius!

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Molly squealed with tears of joy in her eyes, hugging her youngest son to her chest.

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George huffed at his mother crossing his arms, Fred behind him nodding in agreement.

Molly pushed Ron away, her eyes darting between the twins and her husband.

"Everyone, excuse us for a second we need to talk to the boys" Molly said, before Arthur and herself led both Fred and George out of the room.

"Mum, Dad what's going--" Fred started but was cut off by his father.

"Boys, It's time you knew the truth--" Arthur started.

"But this doesn't mean we don't love you any less than the others" Molly added with tears in her eyes.

"We are not your real parents" Arthur and Molly said together hand in hand.

"WHAT?!" Fred screamed.

"Then who is?" George asked shocked.

"The truth is Severus Snape is your mother. She is a female but has been hiding under a potion for her own protection, and was not able to keep you for your own safety. Your father is Lucius Malfoy, but he doesn't know. Lucius got drunk one night and took advantage of your, at the time naïve mother" Molly explained.

"WHAT THE?! THIS HAS TO BE A JOKE! SNAPE IS OUR MOTHER AND WAS RAPED BY MALFOY!?" Fred screamed, George seemed frozen in shock.

"That's why I don't like Lucius" Arthur added.

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

We are such a happy family!

"You're a prefect? Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Molly cried.

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George huffed, while Fred pouted.

"Oh boys! Stop being such drama queens, you know what I meant" Molly sighed.

"Yes, we love you all the same" Arthur added.

"I know! Lets sing a family song!" Molly shouted pulling everybody in the room into a group hug.

"All together now!" Arthur said, Molly and himself not noticing the looks of horror on the other faces.

Molly and Arthur started signing "I love you. You love me. We are such a happy family …" It was going to be a long night.

_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Happily Ever After!

"You're a prefect?" Oh Ronnie! That's everyone in the family!" Molly cried, her voice full of joy as she hugged her youngest son to her chest.

"What are Fred and I? Next door neighbours?" George huffed folding his arms, while Fred pouted.

"As a matter of fact you now are, your mother and I make a deal last year. If you two failed in your school reports one more time we would divorce you." Arthur told the twins.

"Goodbye, here are your bags! Have a good life!" Molly said happily handing them their things.

After they left in tears Molly smiled "Thank goodness"

After that Percy moved back in, and life was great for everyone in the Weasley family!

Everyone lived happily ever after, everyone apart from the Weasley twins!

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	3. S'up?

Chapter 3

_"S'up Figgy?"__ Mundungus Fletcher_

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Is That All?

"S'up Figgy?" Mundungus Fletcher yawned, covering his mouth with his thin, dirty hand.

"WHAT'S UP!?" Windowed cat lover, Mrs. Arabella Figg roared at the top of her lungs, poking him in the chest with her stick thin fingers.

"I'll tell you '_what's up_'! Harry and his fat oaf of a cousin nearly died! You should have been here watching him! You Idiot!" Mrs. Figg screamed.

"Is That all!?" Mundungus asked wincing, rubbing his now sore ears.

"NO, that's _'not all'_, you moron! I'm pregnant with _your _child! That's what's frigging up!" Mrs. Figg huffed, folding her arms.

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Busted

"S'up Figgy?" Mundungus asked as he entered the kitchen of Grimmauld Place on a cold and dreary morning.

"Oh my house in Surry flooded and Dumbledore thought it best I stay here for a while," the squib sighed, clutching her tea cup as she began to shake at the thoughts of her precious water-logged cats.

"You mean, nobody is at your house?" The con-man asked, trying not to sound excited.

"No" but before she could say anything else the man had apparated away.

It wasn't until the next day when the Muggle newspaper reported a mass drug bust in her old area that she wished she owned a wand.

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_Author: _Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Windswept

Mundungus Fletcher and Arabella Figg had an odd relationship, built around the careful (or not so careful, depending on who you were talking about) watch of one Harry Potter.

Arabella spent day after day watching the young man walk the circuit of his family's home in Surrey, waiting for the day when something would happen – for it was sure to.

"S'up Figgy?" Dung asked, entering the small lace filled living room. Arabella turned to look at the man who had become her companion and promptly started giggling.

"Your hair!" she shouted, pointing at his wig, swept upright by the wind.

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_Author:_ marauder-xx

Saved

"S'up Figgy?" Mundungus said as he came back from his stolen cauldron romp.

"I'll tell you what's up!" she shouted, but upon seeing him she lost her nerve, "You have gorgeous eyes"

Mundungus was slightly taken aback and saved by an alarm in the distance, rushing from the house he murmured, "Saved by the bell."

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	4. Birthday

Chapter 4

_"So, all in all, not one of Ron's better birthdays?" Fred_

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_Author:_ digigirl02

Hermione's Announcement

After a rough day of school that included an exploded cauldron and a fight with Malfoy which led to a detention, Ron was looking forward to going back to the Burrow that night for a special meal with his family and friends. It was then that Ron was going to make his move. Having not been able to see Hermione all day, Ron was especially looking forward to the dinner. It's now or never he thought as he sat between his best friend and crush. Noticing Hermione and his sister whispering excitedly, he wondered what their giggling about, he told himself, that whatever it was it'll pale in comparison once he makes his announcement.

Once the whole family was gathered together, Hermione asked for everyone's attention. Blushing wildly, she said "Victor has just sent me an owl asking for my hand in marriage," Ron stiffed. "And I accepted." Ron paled, of all the things she could have said, he wasn't expecting that.

Noticing his brother's dismayed face as the rest of the family congratulated her; Fred leaned over and whispered into his twin's ear. So, all in all, not one of Ron's better birthdays?"

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_Author:_ Panny

A No Good Very Bad Birthday

"I'm telling you Fred, it was terrible."

"Was it really that bad, George?"

"Worse. First he practically choked to death at breakfast. Then he walks in on Harry and Ginny doing the horizontal mambo, on_ his_ bed, and they have the nerve to kick him out. So he goes to Hermione for some comfort, only to find her playing with the ring you gave her. Poor guy found out about you two by listening to her giggle 'Mrs. Fred Weasley' to herself. I think that's about when he passed out."

"So, all in all, not one of Ron's better birthdays?"

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Double Trouble

The small gathering of red heads cringed as Ron's pained cries floated down the stairs. Everybody's attention seemed to be focussed upstairs, which was probably a good thing considering the two responsible for their younger brothers anguish still hadn't calmed down from their fit of giggles. Who would have thought a jar of maple syrup and a feather pillow could end up causing so much delicious mayhem?

"Boys …" Mr Weasley started in a warning tone but Fred and George knew they wouldn't be punished. Their father listed their crimes and minor punishment, causing the twins to laugh harder and even Percy couldn't help crack a smile, before concluding with, "So, all in all, not one of Ron's better birthdays?"

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	5. Galleons

Chapter 5

_"Time is Galleons, little brother."_

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

On The House

"Hey Fred," Ron called as quietly as he could, approaching his older brother.

"Yes Ron?" Fred asked, replenishing the stock on the joke shops shelves.

"Can I ask you a favour … can you, I mean to say …" he stuttered.

"Time is Galleons, little brother" Fred sung, as Ron's face burned red.

"Can you lend me some coins?" Ron blurted out embarrassed.

"What for?"

"I wanted to get Hermione a present." Ron said, turning redder still. Fred smiled and caught sight of the puking pastilles in his brothers' hand.

"Sure Ron, infact, it's on the house." He grinned.

George found Fred rolling on the floor laughing a few minutes later, and started laughing too when he caught sight of Hermione going blue in the face as she yelled at their little brother. Life was good when you owned a joke shop.

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_Author: _ Mistymist

Big Decision

"Would you just hurry up and decide already" George huffed tapping his foot on the cobblestone pavement.

"Tis' a very important decision and not one to be taken lightly" Ron replied still concentrating deeply on his decision.

"Well time is Galleons, little brother and time's a wastin' How about you just come by the shop when you make your choice and we'll go from there?"

Ron made a noise of agreement but otherwise didn't acknowledge his brother's words. Another twenty minutes past as he weighed up his options.

In the end he gave up and got a plain vanilla cornet.

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_Author _remuslives 

Puberty

Percy sat in the backyard of the Burrow, waiting. Finally, 12 year old Fred burst through the bushes. "Do you have it?" Percy held out his hand.

"Hang on, I got it here somewhere," Fred said, digging through his pockets.

"Time is Galleons, little brother."

"Here it is." He handed the pilfered item to the older boy.

"Excellent!" Percy examined it closely. "And you're certain it's Luna's?" Fred nodded his head and watched his brother stroll into the house.

"Did he take it?" George asked peeking through the bushes. Before Fred could answer, Mrs. Weasley's voice carried from the house.

"Percival Weasley! What _are_ you doing with you're little sister's bra?!"

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_Author_: Book Mad TJ!

To Ron once! 

Hermione huffed "Please, don't leave!"

Fred grinned "Sorry love, things to do, places to be."

Hermione pouted "Don't go, I know it's late but can't you stay? Please?"

"Sorry love, I don't have time, you know how much I want to stay…But I have to get back, I promised George we would finish the new firework set tonight."

"Don't rush!" Hermione sighed taking his hand into hers.

"Time is Galleons, my sweet dear." Fred told Hermione.

"You said that to Ron once!" Hermione reminded him.

"Nope!"

"Yes you did!"

"Would I really say 'Time is Galleons, my sweet dear' to Ronnie!? I said _'Time is Galleons, little brother_.' "

"Opps, yes the first one did sound _a little strange _for you to be saying to Ron" Hermione agreed laughing.

"Anyway if I finish this tonight the more time I get to spend with you tomorrow!" Fred said leaning down to kiss her.

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	6. Alarm

Chapter 6

_"Tomorrow," said Ron in a muffled voice, "I'd rather you set the alarm clock."_

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_Author:_ x-Ice-Queen-x

Boys will be Boys

Harry suppressed a grin as he watched Dean and Seamus work.

"He's never going to forget this!" Seamus laughed wickedly as he waved his wand with a flourish.

"Have you got it, Potter?" Dean asked. Harry hopped of the bed he had been sitting on and went to his trunk.

"Right here." He said, producing a small bottle filled with purple liquid. "Three drops."

After the finishing touch was applied, the boys scampered back to their beds.

"Five... four... three... two..." Seamus counted down.

"BLOODY HELL!" Ron Weasley sat up as a wetness spread throughout his sheets. He looked around in confusion before noticing that his bed had been transfigured into a crib.

"Wakey-wakey,_ Rhonnnda_." Dean sang.

"Looks like he's had a little accident!" Seamus crowed with laughter. Ron sighed in resignation before heading to the bathroom. The door slammed shut.

"Tomorrow," said Ron in a muffled voice, "I'd rather you set the alarm clock."

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_Author:_ Panny

Should Have Known

Ron should have known not to trust anything in the Burrow with the twins spending the night. He really should have. When he reached toward the nightstand, ready to crawl into bed, and missed his target, he shouldn't have just chalked it up to his tiredness. He should have known right then. When he felt the slight spark, he should have figured it all out. Instead he ignored it as a faulty conversion of muggle technology and grabbed it full on.

Harry laughed his arse off as Ron yelped and fell to the floor, tossing the rapidly spinning and sparking object across the room before returning to his bed and ducking his head beneath the covers. He could hear laughter coming from downstairs.

"Tomorrow," said Ron in a muffled voice, "I'd rather you set the alarm clock."

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Going For The Kill

The assailant approached the victim silently, her breath coming in short and shallow as she anticipated going in for the kill. Holding her weapon loosely by her side she took the last few cushioned steps until she hovered above his sleeping form. A small smile flitted across her lips as she pushed the trigger and found her target.

She bit her lip as her much smaller accomplice came in for the final blow, gently caressing the man with a feather under his nose. This produced the desired effect and the younger of the two let out an excited squeal as her father slapped his shaving cream laden hand to his face, waking himself up.

"Tomorrow," said Ron in a muffled voice, "I'd rather you set the alarm clock."

Hermione and Rose were laughing so hard it was hard to tell if they heard him.

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	7. Battle

Chapter 7

_"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear." __- The Mirror_

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_Author:_ Mistymist

Potter Legacy

Charlus Potter had never been so nervous in his life. He had never had a proper unsupervised date with the lovely Dorea Black.

Several minutes passed before he heard a quite knock on the door.

"Charlie, Are you there?" The sweet voice of his girl asked.

"Yes just one moment Dorrie" Charlus took a deep breath and rushed to the mirror by the door. He ran his hands through his infinitely messy hair, trying to flatten it.

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear," Said the mirror.

Charlus frowned "Yes, I guess I am"

"Never mind dear looks aren't everything"

Charlus poked out his tongue immaturely before opening the door and smiling wildly at the pretty redhead standing there.

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_Author:_ Panny 

Tell-tale Red

"There must be some way to do this," Ron grumbled, his newly acquired hand-me-down wand gripped tightly in his hand. He waved it at his head again but got no result.

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear," the mirror chimed with a slight giggle. He glared at it and flicked the wand at his hair for the hundred time, finally causing it to emit a quick spray of sparks.

"Yes!" he cheered, feeling more optimistic. He twisted his wrist with a flourish and flinched when the end exploded in his face.

"Ronald! It's time to go!"

He quickly rubbed his face, missing a smudge of ash on his nose, and grabbed his trunk to head downstairs resignedly. There was just no way to avoid people comparing him as a Weasley.

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_Author:_ x-Ice-Queen-x

Perfect

"Hermione, are you almost ready to go?" The witch in question rolled her eyes as she struggled with her clothing.

"It fit just last week!" She cried in annoyance as she tried to pull her shirt over her bulging belly.

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear." The mirror in front of her said. Hermione glanced at her reflection and burst into tears.

Fred rushed into the room, "Hermione! what's wrong?"

"I am so FAT!" Hermione wailed. Fred put his arms around her.

"Love," He began patiently, "You're pregnant."

"I am a _house_!" She insisted.

"You're perfect." He replied, kissing her soundly.

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Always The Optimist

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear." Her long suffering mirror said kindly as Hermione retied the blue ribbon in Rose's hair, attempting to get it to sit down just right.

Sighing, she stood back up, "I know, I just want everything to be perfect today."

"Just be yourself and everything will be fine," the mirror responded, always the optimist.

"That's what I'm afraid of," Hermione muttered as she took Rose's hand, preparing to apparate them to the local muggle primary school. She had to get them to accept the witch one way or another … she just had to.

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_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Stuck Together

Harry looked into the mirror, it was the day of his wedding. He was about to marry Ginny.

He felt so nervous, Harry went over to the mirror again and tried to flatten his hair, for the wedding.

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear." The mirror said as Harry turned his back on it.

Wait… Harry turned back around, fast, **he had heard that voice before!**…Why was Voldemort in his mirror?

Voldemort grinned.

"I never died, I got stuck in your mirror. I've been here for years. By the way you look good naked" Voldemort winked, stuck in the mirror forever…

"Harry if it doesn't work out with that Ginny girl, I'm free. Just come to the mirror if you want a real loving" Voldemort said batting his eyelashes.

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_Author:_ oOoJadedoOo

Fight

Luna stood in her room adjusting her rainbow toe socks, they were her favorite.

"Luna come on were going to be late." Harry yelled from the next room

"Be there in a moment" She answered as she put in her radish earrings on in front of the mirror. She was dressed in her usual fashion. Her knee high rainbow socks were paired with a plaid skirt and bright blue shirt. Her wand stuck behind her ear. "Perfect" She said and sauntered out the door.

Hours later they returned home and entered the room together. "I'm just saying Luna, that muggles are going to comment when you dress like that, if you could just dress a little more subtly when we go to muggle places…"He trailed off running his hand through his hair

"Oh you're embarrassed by me then Harry. What they say doesn't bother me but it does you." Luna said serenely the only sign of her temper was the slamming of the bath room door

Harry let out a frustrated sigh and heard from the direction of the bureau

"You're fighting a losing battle there, dear."

"I don't need comments from the peanut gallery." He mumbled

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	8. Hearts

Chapter 8

"Blimey, Harry, you nearly gave me heart failure!" _- Neville Longbottom_

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_Author:_oOoJadedoOo

Yes I can even turn a Neville quote into a Harry/Luna story

Harry tip toed his way down the empty dark corridor, meeting Luna had been a risk but it was well worth it. As he walked he thought of the hours he had spent in the dark class room with Luna. He had learned stuff no teacher could have ever taught him. Harry was so immersed in his thoughts he collided with some one.

"Ough" Harry said at impact then kept very still waiting to see who or what it was he had run into.

Neville had fallen over from the force of the collision. The look on his face had Harry double over in laughter as he pulled off his invisibility cloak.

"Blimey, Harry, you nearly gave me heart failure!"

"Sorry Neville" Harry stuttered through his laughter.

Neither boy asked what the other was doing out of their dorm as they made their way back to the Gryffindor tower.

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_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Wrong Crowd

Harry watched as the snitch buzzed past Malfoy's ear and then headed straight toward him. It was so easy to just reached out with one hand and grab it, winning the Quidditch Cup for Gryffindor and being popular not because of a scar but because of his skills.

The crowd was in a frenzy by the time he was able to extract himself from his teammates in the air, and as he landed it was only one set of arms he wanted to feel around him.

"Cho," he whispered as he leaned in to kiss her. That was when she turned around and back handed him.

Harry shouted and woke up, inches from Neville's face in the boys dorms. The two blinked at each other before Harry scrambled up onto his feet.

"Blimey, Harry, you nearly gave me heart failure!"

"Merlin Harry, this is getting ridiculous. I think its time you went to the hospital wing," Ron said sleepily.

As Harry climbed back into bed he agreed with them, if anyone knew how to cure sleepwalking it was Madam Pomfrey.

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_Author :_ Mistymist

Green House Seven

Neville liked to spend time on warm spring days in Greenhouse Seven which had a cooling charm placed upon it.

He had mentioned this fact only once or twice to his roommates but they had never joined him.

He sat quietly partially hidden by the oversized orange blooms of his favourite plant, listening to music through his earmuffs. (Hermione had charm them for him) He did not hear Harry approaching until he tapped him on the shoulder lightly and mouthed the words.

"Hi, Neville, mind if I join you?"

Neville jumped and clutched his chest. "Blimey Harry, you nearly gave me heart failure"

Then they both laughed.

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_Author:_ x-Ice-Queen-x

Seeing Snape

"Neville," Harry had said to him earlier, "Snape wants to see you in his office."

Neville tried to calm himself down as walked towards the Potions Master's office. He hadn't done anything wrong, it had been a full week since he'd melted a cauldron. He was going for a record!

Neville stepped inside the office. He was immediately attacked by what looked like a large bat.

"Professor Snape! Stop!" He cried, before hearing laughter. He looked up to see Harry standing on Ron's shoulders, a large black robe draped around them.

"Blimey, Harry, you nearly gave me heart failure!"

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	9. Calm

Chapter 9

"I will not calm down!" _- Hermione Granger_

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_Author:_ oOoJadedoOo

Next Time

"Hermione, just calm down."

"I will not calm down." Hermione said between her teeth. "Our _darling_ chil just nearly got himself expelled."

"He didn't though love, so take a deep breath."

"George Weasley wipe that smirk off your face, if I didn't know better I would think you were proud of him."

George fought to keep his face in a somber expression. "You have to admit it was pretty inventive."

"And smart, it would have been smarter if he didn't get caught.' Hermione replied smiling despite herself.

"Well next time..." George began before Hermione cut him off

'If there is a next time, I'll murder the both of you."

* * *

_Author:_Mistymist

I am not an Owl

Hermione stomped her feet loudly as she paced before Ron, she was livid and to be perfectly honest absolutely fed up with her boys and their oblivious ways.

"'Mione, please calm down, I only asked you one simple tiny little favour." Ron said in a tone that suggested his best friend was being completely unreasonable.

"Ron I have three things to say to you. Firstly no I will not calm down!" she began in a very loud and obvious voice, simply gathering steam by the sound of things "Secondly How any times do I have to ask you _**not **_to call me Mione? And thirdly..." her voice was so high pitched now Ron was sure everyone in the building and possibly half of London could hear her. "I am not. Your, Bloody. Owl! If you can't tell Harry bleeding Potter your best friend in the entire world that **you love him **than I am certainly not going to do it for you!"

With that Hermione turned on her heel and stormed out of the room, leaving a gobsmacked Ron in her wake.

* * *

_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Blame It On The Boogie

"RON! You were out all night! Have you forgotten you have a wife and kids here?!" Hermione screamed as her husband walked into the door at midnight.

"Hermione, just calm down. Hermione, love…I was just …" Ron stuttered.

"I will not calm down! What are you doing anyway!? _Are you cheating on me_?!" She yelled, with her hands on her hips.

"No Harry's here too…" Ron pointed to Harry behind him.

Harry waved.

"HARRY! You should be home with Ginny! What have you two being doing!?" Hermione huffed, still very angry at both of them.

"Dancing." Ron said.

"Dancing?! Don't lie to me Ronald! " Hermione shouted.

"I have never told you this but I love dancing, so does Harry, so we went to a dancing school…" Ron sobbed, breaking down.

Harry started dancing and signing to prove Ron's point.

"Don't blame it on sunshine! Don't blame it on moonlight! Don't blame it on good times! … Blame it on the Boogie!**"**

* * *

_Author: _Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Orange

"Hermione, my love, my darling, my life!" Fred called, his arms spread wide, ready to embrace her.

"I'm not speaking to you," the witch growled, pushing past her lover and stomping into the back room of WWW.

"Oh, don't be like that, it was an accident …"

"An accident? An accident?? You mean to tell me that slipping pixie dust into my morning coffee was an accident?!" She screeched, turning to point her wand at his chest.

Fred shrugged, "Well the side effect was an accident; George and I never anticipated this. Maybe you should calm down a little and just wait for it to go away?"

"I will not calm down!" she yelled, shooting a hex at his feet causing him to jump back out of the room.

"Orange really is your colour!" he shouted as the door slammed shut in his face; the very orange skinned witch could still hear his laughter on the other side. She would make him pay.

* * *

_Please Review!_


	10. Quiet Life

Chapter 10

"I like a quiet life, you know me." - Harry Potter

* * *

_Author:_ Mistymist

Lives to love

The headline reads **The Boy Who Lived to Love…**_**Everyone**__. _

Nominee for Bachelor of the Year Harry Potter (Pictured above with both Padma and Pavarti Patil) was recently quoted having said _"I like the quiet life,you know me". _Is obviously either deranged or has a wicked sense of humour.We have photographic evidence that Mr Potter is living anything but a quiet life, attending several exclusive parties never once being accompanied by the same companion once. Perhaps a more apt quote would be _"I live to love and love to live."_

Picture editorial continued on pages 47 and 48.

* * *

_Author:_ Book Mad TJ

Simple Girl

"Harry?" Ginny said smiling.

"Yes, dear?"

"How long have we been together?" Ginny turned to face Harry.

"Five years, I'm now twenty-two, your twenty, nearly twenty-one. We have been together since I was seventeen and you fifteen, nearly sixteen."

"That long?" Ginny sighed.

"Don't worry, your still the most beautiful person in the world."

Ginny smiled, blushing, her Harry was just perfect in every way.

"Why did you choose me? So many young, rich, beautiful girls want you, why me?" Ginny asked, it was not like her to say this, but she just wanted to know.

She loved Harry so much, her heart ached because of it, but why would the most loved man in the world love HER back?

She was unpredictable, loud, sometimes too brave for her own good, quick to anger, and she loved adventure, not really suited for being a wife.

"Well I choose you, because, _I like a quiet life, you know me._ And you're the perfect quiet life girl." Harry grinned.

Ginny laughed catching on to her new husband's joke, everyone knew she was the very opposite of a shy and quiet, simple girl.

* * *

_Author:_ oOoJadedoOo

Twins

Harry was sitting in his garden well his children ran in circles yelling like banshee, a smile splitting his face.

"So Harry, are you sure you want to have any more children?" Luna asked him as she sat beside him.

"Yes, I'm sure" He answered rubbing her barely mounded belly

"This isn't too much for you" She laughed indicating the three toddlers running around still.

"Of course not, I like a quiet life, you know me." He said laughing

"Well that's good news, I just found out were having twins." Luna said serenely.

* * *

_Author:_ x-Ice-Queen-x

Shower Time!

Fred and George covered their ears as the wailing continued.

"Mum, make it stop!" Fred cried. Molly sat at the table, trying herself to drown out the obnoxious noise, Arthur and Ginny sitting nearby.

"No wonder he can't hold down a girl.." Ron muttered from the doorway.

"Ronald!" Molly quickly jumped to her son's defense. "Percy's singing ability --"

"Or lack thereof." George commented. Molly glared and continued.

"-- had nothing to do with his romantic relation--" They all stopped to listen to the silence. Harry entered the room soon after, twirling his wand. They all stared.

"What?" Harry asked, "I like a _quiet _life, you know me." The Weasleys laughed.

Percy could be unsilenced _after _he was done in the shower.

* * *

_Author:_ Grande.Vanilla.Skim.Latte

Silent Treatment

She raised her hand but quickly lowered it. It was well beneath her to knock, and thoroughly uncouth to signify ones presence in such a manner. He was expecting her after all.

She drew her wand and muttered a quick Alohamora. The door sprung open but the moment she stepped inside a series of alarms and fireworks set off in her face.

"Harry! You barbarian! Make it stop," she screeched when she caught sight of him at the end of the hall.

"I like the quite life, you know me well enough by now to know I couldn't just let any old person through my door," he laughed, making the noise stop before pulling her into his embrace.

"Oh I will give you the quiet life alright," she said, stomping off in search of tea, giving him the silent treatment for the rest of the night. It wasn't the visit he was expecting.

* * *

_Please Review!_


	11. Dark

Chapter 11

_"Yeah, well, it's harder in the dark --" - George Weasley_

* * *

_Author: _remuslives

The Silent Closet

George felt the sweat breaking out on his forehead. The small blonde tucked between him and the wall was squirming and biting her lip.

"George," she whispered breathlessly.

"Sshhh, Luna," he hushed her, "they'll hear us."

"Faster George," she urged desperately, wiggling still more in the confined space.

"I'm trying," his voice was strained. "Almost there."

"Yes!" she exclaimed.

The door to their closet flung open and Fred grinned at the two. "Got cha."

"Dammit!" George threw the Decoy Detonator he had been struggling with to the floor. Fred looked at the tangled string on the half mangled product and shook his head at his brother. "Yeah, well, it's harder in the dark."

* * *

_Author:_ .

Caught in the Act

"Shh George, you'll wake mum up," Fred hissed.

"Me? You're the one whose shouting,"

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are. And will you stop wriggling about!" George hissed back down to his brother, reaching once again for the illusive cookie jar.

"Will you stop talking and just get them already," Fred snapped back.

"Yeah, well, it's harder in the dark," George countered, finally reaching the jar and almost toppling back on his brothers shoulders when the kitchen was flooded with light.

"Fred and George Weasley! What have I said about stealing from my kitchen in the dead of night!" their mother screeched.

* * *

_Please Review!_


	12. Crookshanks

Chapter 12

_"Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know"_ ~ Ronald Weasley

* * *

_Author: _MistyMist

"_Oh the injustice of it all,_" Hedwig hooted indignantly as she surveyed her surroundings, _"I am The Chosen One's pet and demand to be treated as such. I should not! I repeat NOT have to rough it like some common barn owl."_

_"Dude, Chill out! It's not that bad I mean to say Mate's room is not like the middle of the black forest or anything. I'm bored, are you bored? We should like totally do something fun!"_ Pig took off zooming around the room. Hedwig would swear the tiny bird lived in pepper-up potion. _"Come on Heddie, think of something fun to do."_

_"How many times do I have to ask you not to call me that? Honestly." _Hedwig was not in the mood for Pigwidgeon's antics.

_"So sorry your highness."_

_"Finally someone who recognises my importance!" Hedwig puffed out her feathers proudly. "It is so nice for a pet to be told how fabulous they are."_

"_Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know." _Pig was getting more bored by the second and if Lady Muck over there didn't get off her high perch soon he might just explode.

_"Oh hardy har har!"_ Hedwig replied, _"Fine one lap around the orchard but that's it!"_

_"Woohoo! Last one there is a flobberworm,"_ Pig hooted excitedly already zooming out the window.

* * *

_Author: _Grande. Vanilla. Skim. Latte

_Who Ate The Pie?_

_"Ron! Have you seen the leftovers from last night? I was going to take them to work for lunch." Hermione called out, her head stuck in the fridge as she rummaged around._

_"Um … no, I haven't seen that delicious piece of pie that was left sitting temptingly in the fridge," Ron replied, walking guiltily into the kitchen._

_"So you weren't in here last night after I had gone to bed and you thought I was asleep?" she asked, turning around to glare at him._

_"Oh yeah, I did stop in for a … glass of milk and I could swear I saw Crookshanks had gotten the fridge open," he claimed wide eyed._

_"So Crookshanks ate my pie did he?" she asked, "Well I hope he knows that if he eats what is clearly labeled mine again he is going to be a lot better acquainted with the tip on my wand."_

_"Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know," Ron said, quickly leaving the room._

_

* * *

_

_Author: _Book Mad TJ

Because You Love Me?

"I'm so sorry!" Ron said distressed.

"Why don't you tell him that. My poor kitty," his wife cried.

"Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know," Ron muttered sweating.

"LET HIM KNOW!? YOU JUST KILLED HIM, BY BEING A IDIOT IN THAT MUGGLE CAR HARRY GOT YOU!"

"I meant when I see in in the after---" Ron was cut off.

"AFTERLIFE? WHY DON'T I JUST SEND YOU TO THE _'AFTERLIFE' _NOW TO TELL HIM_!?" _Hermione yelled at her husband, her dead cat in her arms.

Ron gulped. "Because you love me?" He said weakly.

* * *

_Author:_ x-Ice-Queen-x

Pesky Pets

"Ron, if you aren't going to clean up after your filthy pets, then you shouldn't let them roam all over the dormitories!" Hermione snapped.

"Lay off Hermione, what could Scabbers have done?" Ron kept his eyes on the game of chess he was playing.

"This!" Hermione shoved one of her sweaters in front of his nose as he cringed at the smell.

"That's fixed easily enough.. _Scourgify_." Ron went back to his game, "But you should keep your bloody cat from hacking up furballs on my bed!"

"He's a cat, Ronald, what else would he do? That's not half as bad as your rat leaving his.. _waste _on my clothing. _Some people_ should tell their pets to control their bodily functions." She huffed as walked away.

"Right. Next time I see Crookshanks, I'll let him know." Ron muttered.

* * *

_Author:_ Jazz E. Roisin

Liveworst = Vomit

"I can't believe this!" Rose Weasley said lifting her foot off the floor. She was attempting not to throw up at the smell.

"Well, you have to admit that Crooshanks has style," Scorpious said lifting one eyebrow.

"Ew! Who gave the cat liverworst?" Teddie asked.

"I don't know but if that cat throws up outside my door again I'm going to kick the bloody orange fur ball to the moon," Rose said.

"Alright," Teddie and Scorpious said in unison. "If we see Crooshanks we'll let him know."

Rose growled hopping over the pile of vomit with clear pices of liverworst in it to the bathroom. She turned the water on as high as she could trying to ignore the stiffled laughter coming from her father's godson and her boyfriend.

* * *

_Please Review!_


	13. Hagrid

Chapter 13

_"Hagrid - what's that?"_

* * *

**Please Let Me Forget**

_author: remuslives_

Harry and Ron crept quietly to Hagrid's cabin to avoid Umbridge's ever watchful eyes.

"I can't see anything," Ron complained for about the tenth time since they left their dorm.

"Shut up, Ron. You're going to give us away," Harry reminded him yet again. "And bend down, your shoes are showing."

"Oh, right." Ron hunched his back just as they reached the door. "Should we knock?"

"No way. Someone will hear us. Just go in." They pushed the door slowly open and saw Hagrid leaning far back in his chair with some kind of curly straw lying in his lap.

"Er, Hagrid - what's that?" Ron asked, still covered by the invisibility cloak.

The curly straw jerked off his lap with a startled scream and Hagrid whipped around to see who was speaking. "Who's there?" he asked gruffly. The students stayed absolutely still and silent and before long Hagrid waved it off. "Must've been the wind. Come on back 'ere Syball. Gotta be getting me finished, 'fore it's your turn."

* * *

**The Indiscernable Creature**

by : Jazz E. Roisin

"Hagrid, what is it?" Rose asked looking down at the creature in her lap.

The groundskeeper gave her a stern look."Why aren't yeh in bed?"

Rose looked up at him. "I'm a Weasley," she said. "You haven't answered my question?"

"An I won't… You'll be comin' to see the Headmistress with me."

For a few seconds Rose felt afraid. Then the creature in her lap nuzzled her this creature was it was apparent that only she and Hagrid could see it. Curiosity got the better of her and she followed Hagrid hoping that Minerva McGonagall wouldn't be too upset.


	14. Plans

Chapter 14

_"Change of plan," growled Mad-Eye. _

* * *

**Inconstant Vigilance **

**by: Jazz E. Roisin  
**

Harry turned to look at his niece and godson.

"What!?" Rose asked. "_I _didn't do anything."

With focus away from him, Teddy swished his wand lifting Moody's eye patch. Harry's mouth dropped open.

He decided not to comment on the magical eye. "Field training starts at one.

"Change of plans," Mad-Eye growled. "It's rescheduled for tomorrow."

His orange eye swiveled around sticking when it rolled up. 'So much for constant vigilance,' Rose muttered under her breath, loud enough for Mad-Eye to hear.

She received a glare from Alastor.

To lighten the mood Teddy changed his eyes, "Don't worry, we match!"

* * *

**Change of Plan**

**by: xxjonibaby  
**

Harry stared dumbstruck at the people standing in his kitchen. "That's your _plan_? Have us freeze our asses off, flying out in the open? Have you forgotten that Voldemort has dementors on his side?"

"Of course not, Harry-"

Harry crossed his arms and glared down at them. "This is what's going to happen or I'm just going to _apparate_ out of here myself, liscense be damned."

Albus Dumbledore regarded the Patronus with curiosity as he used the spell to release its message.

"Change of Plan," growled Mad-Eye. "The Advance Guard will fly with Tonks disguised as Potter. Lupin, Jones, and Diggle will travel with Potter by tacksy."

* * *

**Change Of Plans**

**_by: _ranDUMM**

Fred flung ketchup at George. George flung ketchup at Ginny. Ginny flung mashed potato at Fred. Remus looked on with interest as ketchup went flying past his ear in to the champagne, Mr. Weasley looked resigned as ketchup hit him on the belly.

Mrs. Weasley was livid as she walked into the kitchen, as mashed potato hit her on the nose.

"Who did this?" hissed Mrs. Weasley, shaking with anger. Fred, George and Ginny looked up.

"Change of Plan," growled Mad-Eye. "We'll break the news that Voldemort just attacked a Wizard city and killed thirty-two people in the living room, with a fresh glass of some of that Muggle stuff, _Koke_."


	15. Nasty

Chapter 15

_"Enchantingly Nasty" - Albus Dumbledore_

* * *

**Greater Good**

******Author: ranDUMM**  


Gellert Grindelwald looked up from his sheef of papaers, and smiled.

"You look happy today, Albus." Albus turned from the window to give Gellert a troubled look.

"I don't know about this Gel... I feel horrible. I feel extremely nasty." Gel rolled his eyes.

"You should feel glorious! Imagine all the good we're going to do! It's for the greater good. You and your enchantingly brilliant magic." Albus sighed and looked out the window again.

"Enchantingly Nasty."

* * *

**Lily's Squirt Drops **

**Author: Jazz E. Roisin  
**

Lily sat in a chair across from Albus Dumbledore. She kept her eyes on her feet.

"Now now, no need to look so frightened," he said kindly.

A smile tugged the corners of her mouth. She glanced up watching as he popped a Lemon Drop into his mouth. He rolled it around with his tongue, and then his face scrunched up. Lily tried to keep the laughter from her voice. "Do you like it Professor?"

He paused. The taste in his mouth was the perfect resemblance of a skunk's spray. "It's enchantingly nasty," he said a twinkle in his eyes.

* * *

**Yuletide Prank**

**Author: .**

It wasn't just presents that had Fred and George Weasley looking foward to the holidays. Oh no, it was the opportunity to pull of the perfect prank. And Christmas this year was no exception. So once bundled up in their brand new jumpers they preceded to frog march their brother and his friends to the Great Hall singing carols obnoxiously off key.

The remaining staff and students were on edge as a rousing chorus of _Jingle Bells_ could be heard echoing down the hall and as it drew closer all eyes turned to the double doors. Little did the unsuspecting occupants of the Christmas feast notice that things about them began to change, and as the Twins made their dramatic entrance they were caught off guard by the barage of ornaments being flung at them from all directions.

Everyone ducked for cover as angry gnomes, dressed as little elves ruined the Christmas feast, their battle cries spured on by Fred and George's laughter.

"Headmaster, do something!" Professor Sprout hissed as a chain of tinkling bells was wrapped around her neck and she was dragged out into the open.

"Enchantingly nasty little things, aren't they?" Dumbledore chuckled, batting one away from his robes.

"The gnomes or the twins?" someone muttered.

* * *

**The Annual Hogwart's Staff Dress up Party.**

**Author: Book Mad TJ**

"Is this really necessary?" Severus Snape growled, glaring at the Headmaster.

"Now, now Severus my boy, you can't not dress up to the Hogwarts staff dress up party."

"Why did you even invent this stupid thing?" Severus huffed crossing his arms.

"I'm dressing up too." Dumbledore pointed out.

Severus looked at Dumbledore, and rolled his eyes. Dumbledore looked like Neville Longbottom's Grandmother.

"If you could you would dress like that all the time." Snape muttered.

"So what do you think of the costume I made for you?" Dumbledore asked, smiling.

Severus looked down as the bright pink frilly dress Dumbledore had forced him to wear. "It does not suit me. I don't look nasty at all. This will ruin what people think of me"

"Don't worry, you do look nasty." Dumbledore said, his blue eyes twinkling.

"No I don't" Severus pouted, which was a scary sight.

"You do, you look Enchantingly Nasty."


	16. Father's son

Chapter 16

_"You are - truly your father's son, Harry..." ~Sirius Black_

**Wake Up Call **

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

Rose stomped into the kitchen, soaked through with melted chocolate and butterbeer.

"What is this?" she asked, glaring at Harry.

"I'm not sure," Harry said. "Why don't you ask James, maybe he'd know."

The girl nodded turning on her heel to find his innocent, unsuspecting son.

"That was well done, down to the deflection onto your son," Sirius said. "You are truly your father's son Harry."

"I suppose I should go clean her up before Ginny gets home, she's not too fond of my methods to wake up the girls."

Sirius smiled, unfolding the Daily Prophet, "Good luck with that."

**Pranks at night**

**Author: ranDUMM**

Harry rushed into the Common Room to find Sirius already waiting for him in the fire.

"What took you so long Harry?" cried Sirius. "I've been waiting here for ages!" Harry went red.

"Err, sorry Sirius. I kind of had something on..." Sirius frowned as Harry looked down, scuffing his foot into the carpet.

"Like what, Harry?" Harry muttered something without looking up.

"Sorry Harry, didn't catch that?" Harry sighed and looked up.

"Just a little something involving Hermione, whipped cream and ermm...Vibrations." Sirius glanced at the top buttons undone on Harry's shirt, and roared with laughter. He inhaled ashes and fell backward out of the fire. Harry looked at him concernedly, but Sirius quickly reappeared, spitting out ashes and still laughing. He managed to speak in between fits of laughter.

"You are - truly your father's son, Harry..." He continued laughing hard.

Harry went red. "I saw Remus at your flat last week."

That shut Sirius up.


	17. Out of Bed

Chapter 17

_"I wonder what could have bought you out of your bed at this late hour?" Severus Snape DH page 481._

**A Matter of Reconsideration **

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

"I wonder what could have brought you out of your bed in the middle of the night," Severus said from his gilded frame.

Rose turned. "Why do you care?" She put her finger to her chin. "It's because you enjoy watching young girls, lech."

"You should be in Slytherin," he said. "After all that's what you're here for. To see why you were sorted into Ravenclaw. "

"She should be in Slytherin," the Hat said startling both of them. It cleared its throat shouting "SLYTHERIN'"

It fell silent. But it's scream brought the footsteps of the Headmistress to their ears.

**Curiouser and Curiouser**

**Author: Saciice**

Snape tossed and turned in bed, moaning and panting. He finally awoke with a whimper and walked over to the dressing table, pouring himself a glass of water from the jug. He tried to remember what he had been dreaming about, but struggled. He looked down at his tented boxers curiously.

"I wonder what could have brought you out of your bed at this late hour?" he murmured.

**Some Hidden Meaning**

**Author: meltedpoo**

Harry walked around the school corridors with his invisibility cloak covering him. It seemed that he had looked everywhere around the castle and yet no luck visited him. He sighed lowly for umpteenth time.

What luck...I only lost it for a few hours and yet I am already missing him.

He tried sitting down the cold floor. All the walking and suspense of seeing Filch at every corner wore him out greatly.

"Who goes there?" He heard a very familiar voice call out. Dark and ominous voice. He flinched.

"I know you're there, Harry. I can smell you." The voice said again.

Smell me? The nerve of him! I took bath!, he thought but raised his arm and sniffed his shirt despite himself. In doing so, his feet was exposed and, seeing this, Snape removed the cloak.

"I wonder what could have bought you out of your bed at this late hour?" He asked. Years of being under Snape and Harry knew that there was no real anger in his voice.

"Searching...for-"

"The map. Come to my office. We have...stuff to do and discuss"

**On the landing...**

**Author: Lady Arianne Of Ambers Valley**

He looked down at her with an odd look on his face. Hermione shivered slightly as the January night wind chilled her bones through her thin night gown.

"I wonder what could have bought you out of your bed at this late hour?" he said, his voice quiet with a hidden meaning,

"I ... was just... I... ugh... heard a noise," she stammered out, refusing to look at him in the eye. Though she had left Hogwarts over three years earlier, she still felt nervous around him, she supposed it was to do with the raw power that seemed to come off of him.

They stood there, silent for a moment, until they heard the front door opening and closing with a slam, causing the portrait of Mrs. Black to start screaming, as Snape turned around to see who it was, Hermione slipped away into the shadows of her room, closing and locking the door behind her.


	18. Wizard

Week 18

_"You're a wizard, Harry." -Hagrid, PS/SS_

**But Harry**

**Author: wvvampire**

Ron cursed as he stubbed his toe on the corner of the bed.

Harry just laughed as he watched Hagrid haul Ron up by the back of his shirt.

"It's not funny, Harry!" Ron got mad and sat down quickly.

Just then Fang came in and knocked Harry's glasses into the floor as he was licking him excitedly. Before Harry could retrieve them Fang snapped them in half.

"Where am I going to find another pair of glasses at this time of night."

"You're a wizard, Harry. Just spell them back together," Hagrid said with a huff, and Ron laughed.

**Dinner at the Potters**

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

"What I am supposed to do?"

Lily looked up from her book and saw that her Dad had boiled over the dinner.

"Well," Albus said from the door, "you could let Mum cook."

"Or," James said, "you could clean it up before she comes home.

"But how?" a distressed Harry said.

Just then Ginny walked through the door, leading a beaming Hagrid. "You're a wizard Harry, " he said. He lifted his pink umbrella aiming it at the pot. It cleaned itself and the stew inside of it simmered quietly.

"A damn good one, too," Ginny agreed setting the table.


	19. Thick

Week 19

_"How thick can you get?" - Ron Weasley, (CS12)._

**Misunderstanding**

**Author: pentastic**

"How thick can you get?" Ron whispered ecstatically.

Harry responded, "Oh about an inch and a half."

"Huh? Harry what are you on about? I was talking about Crabbe and Goyle eating the cakes."

"Oh, right..."

The next few minutes were spent in awkward silence.

**Too Much Draco **

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

Draco Malfoy stood on a cruise ship. The deck was completely bare of people, and it glistened in the sun. His blond hair, ruffled by the breeze, fell over his gray eyes. The muscles in his legs were clearly defined, and his chest was bare, tan, and toned with solid abs and smooth pectorals.

"What's wrong?" Hermione asked.

Rose held up the picture, across the top of which was written: Join me, the Pureblood Stud for a photo shoot, Nov. 34th.

"How thick can you get?" Ron asked, snatching the picture from his daughter and throwing it into the fire.


	20. Revenge

Week 20

_"I'll get her back for this if it's the last thing I do!" ~ Hermione, pg594 GoF_

**Volatile Intelligence **

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

Hermione stood by the window, her face flushed red.

"What happened?" Lily asked in a hushed whisper.

"I dunno," Rose answered. "But I haven't seen Mum this mad for a long time."

Harry approached his best friend cautiously, "Just calm down…"

She whirled around, tears pricking her eyes. "I'll get her back for this if it's the last thing I do!"

With that, the brightest and most dangerous Muggle-born stormed out the door and apparated to Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. Lavender Brown would regret the day she messed with Hermione Jean Weasley. Revenge would be sweeter than a sugar quill.


	21. Stroll

_A/N – Dribble Drabble is a challenge that takes place once a month on the Twin Exchange Forum (see profile for links and information). Each month, on the 1st or 2nd, depending on your location, a new quote from the Harry Potter books or movies is posted and anyone is invited to write a drabble in response to what the characters could or should have said in that situation, or come up with a situation of their own. Each chapter is a different quote, so hop on over the forum if you feel like giving it a go!_

Week 21

_"Nothing like a nighttime stroll to give you ideas. " ~ Mad Eye Moody, GoF_

**Quidditch **

**Author: Wisdom's Shadow**

Hermione walked through the damp grass of Hogwarts. It was a little after two in the morning but she couldn't sleep, and the warm, June night was calling to her.

She walked through the grass to the quidditch pitch. She could see two dark figures racing though the air.

It wasn't until she was closer that she saw who the figures were. None other than the Weasley twins, which she should have expected. Why wouldn't they be in bed? When she saw they were shirtless, she had to run back inside, day-dreaming the whole way.

**Voice of Reason **

**Author: Jazz E. Roison**

She stood on the bridge gazing at the stars' reflection in the small pond.

"Nothing like a night time stroll to give you ideas," a gruff voice said.

Hermione turned her head. But there wasn't anyone there. She sighed. That had been happening a lot recently. She would hear voices of those she knew were dead.

"I just don't know where she could be," she growled worry bubbling in her stomach. She vowed to find her oldest daughter. And when she did she'd show her how much she really loved her, no matter how many fights they go into.


	22. Truth

_Week 22_

_"It is my belief... that the truth is generally preferable to lies." ~ Albus Dumbledore, GoF_

**Sometimes Lies Are Preferable to the Truth.**

**Author: knifethrowastarr**

Hermione crossed her arms across her chest and looked from one twin to the other. "One of you better tell me what happened to my knickers, or so help me…" she trailed off, becoming even more infuriated with the two.

George and Fred shared a nervous look.

"Well you see, pet…" Fred started.

"What happened was…" George began.

Hermione stomped her foot, her frustration getting the better of her. "A wise wizard once said that the truth is generally preferable to lies."

George pointed at Fred and exclaimed. "He wanted to try them on!"

Fred pointed right back at his twin. "He wanted to take pictures of me in them!"

Hermione looked shocked, before bursting into laughter. "Next time, I think I'd prefer that you'd lie to me."

**A Matter of Skill**

**Author: remuslives**

Professor Sprout stood, straightening out her cloak and setting her hat back in place. "Well?"

"McGongall was better, more skilled, I'm sorry," Dumbledore responded. He placed an arm around Sprout's shoulders as her face crumpled in grief and embarrassment. "There there, my dear Pomona. It is my belief that the truth is generally preferable to lies. In that, I must say that never once has Minerva been able to finish me with her mouth alone. And there you stand, having completed the job twice."

"Does that mean you'll give me another chance?" she asked, hopeful.

"As many as you'd like."

**Detention**

**Author: Nynayve**

"DETENTION! The four of you, my office, 8pm SHARP!" McGonagall stormed away, her robes flashing red and gold.

"Prongs, why didn't you spout off a clever speech, designed to twist her around your words and, most importantly, _get us out of trouble!_" Sirius whined that night, as Minnie had them cleaning out the toilets, with tooth brushes. She had even taken their wands!

"Well, Pads, my friend, I find that sometimes, I must listen to my betters. To quote our wise headmaster, 'It is my belief... that the truth is generally preferable to lies', and so, I let her catch us."

Remus, who had been listening while cleaning, threw his toothbrush at James. "You prat, quit lying. You just couldn't think of an excuse fast enough for why you we were pointing our wands at slytherins, and Minnie just _happened_ to enter the room."

"Hush Moony, Padfoot doesn't need to know that."


	23. Pocket Watch

_Entry 23_

_"Well, thank you for that assessment, Mr Weasley. Perhaps it would be more useful if I were to transfigure Mr Potter or yourself into a pocket watch. That way, one of you might be on time." ~ Minerva McGongall, SS/PS_

**A Climax**

**Author: remuslives**

Minerva twirled a length of hair between her fingers, she was really getting too old for this nonsense. What did they think? That she had all the time in the world to wait on them? She swore if they were late just one more time, she would end the whole mess. She didn't know what she was thinking taking up with them in the first place.

She glanced at her watch and sighed; she'd just have to take care of things herself. Closing her eyes she smoothed her hands down her body, imagining much younger hands in place of her own. Slipping her fingers into her under garments, she moaned softly and began to rub little circles. She quickened the pace as she pictured their youthful faces, lips locked together, hands grabbing at each other. She climaxed just as the door opened and the two boys stumbled in, eyes widening.

"Blimey," Ron gasped, pulling Harry closer to himself. "That was hot, that was."

"Well, thank you for that assessment, Mr. Weasley. Perhaps it would be more useful if I were to transfigure Mr. Potter or yourself into a pocket watch. That way, one of you might be on time," she huffed.


	24. Spiders

_Entry 24_

_"Why spiders? Why couldn't it be 'follow the butterflies'? " ~ Ron Weasley, CoS_

**Title: Decorations**

**Author: Nynayve**

"Whoa, where is the Burrow?" Harry asked upon landing from their Apparation.

"Probably somewhere under the cobwebs. Mrs. Weasley must have let the twins decorate," Hermione replied, standing next to him. "Look, there's a sign. 'For full enjoyment of the House of Haunted Horrors, Follow the Spiders'."

"'Follow the Spiders'? Why spiders? Why couldn't it be 'follow the butterflies'?" Ron whimpered, eyes avoiding the long trail of arachnids.

Hermione waved her wand, and the spiders changed into butterflies. "Come on, before the twins notice and change them back. And make the bigger."


	25. No Magic

_Entry 25_

_"We're not going to use magic?" ~ Ron Weasley, OotP_

**Title: Out of Dreams**

**Author: Jazz E. Roisin**

"We're not going to use magic?" Ron asked.

He shook his head. "The whole point is to surprise her, and she'll know if you use magic."

It was shortly after this comment that they heard Lily's voice. "No, keep your eyes closed," James admonished.

When they reached the yard Lily gasped. Her backyard was transformed into the Rose Palace complete with a brick wall overlooking a sapphire blue pond. She glanced around at her family trying to ask whose idea this was.

"Happy birthday," Teddy said giving her a hug. She looked up at him a grin on her face.

* * *

**Title: The Attic**

**Author: shaybo**

The attic of Grimmauld Place was filled with broken furniture and ancient, unidentifiable objects. Every surface was covered in dust, and mold covered the decaying wood walls.

"Come on kids," Mrs. Weasley said to her offspring, stuffing an old clock into her garbage bag. "Let's get this place cleaned up." Fred grumbled and took out his wand, preparing to _scourgify_ the room until his mother snatched his wand away. "Oh no you don't!"

Ron's mouth gaped. "We're not going to use magic?"

"Not if you want dinner. Now get to work!" she ordered.


	26. Treasure

_Entry 26_

_"Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." ~ Albus Dumbledore wrote on his family's gravestones, DH pg 325_

**Title: Who Said It?**

**Author: Nynayve**

"Professor Dumbledore put on his families gravestones, 'Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also', and I think he was right, but had it backward. You are my treasure, Hermione, and you have my heart. Will you marry me?"

* * *

**Title: Treasures Held**

**Author: remuslives**

Harry held the delicate hand in his own as he walked slowly through the graveyard in Godric's Hollow. It had been years since he had first came to the resting place of his parents. Sighing, he stopped momentarily to read the headstone of Dumbledore's family, "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

Grinning a little, he looked down at his godson, "Guess I should give you some treasure, Teddy."

The five year old just giggled and swung their hands.

"You're right, you're already my treasure." He led them on to find his mother and father.

* * *

**Title: Treasure in Rebuilding**

**Author: Caprican**

George gazed around the the ruins of WWW. An amused smile crossed his face as Ron tried (and failed) to lift a half-destroyed box of canary cremes only to be caught by Fred. In the corner he could see Ginny and Harry trying to right a stack of shelves, while his other three brothers worked on repairing boxes and salvaging merchandise.

He should be devastated by the shambles. Years of work simply laid waste to by who-knew-how-many Death Eaters. He should be sad to see their creations crushed to smithereens. He should be appalled that bits of the walls were missing and the front windows were smashed in.

But as he looked around, seeing his entire family actively helping he and Fred rebuild their lives, he couldn't help but smile. It was a fresh beginning. They were all safe and everyone would now have a chance to start over. It was then that he realized how far his priorities had come, from creating simply making as many galleons as possible, to relishing in his intact and happy family.

In that moment he understood. "Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

* * *

**Title: Nothing**

**Author: Shaybo**

"Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also."

Draco snorted, tossing the slip of paper in the trash and taking a bite of his eggroll. He never put much stock in fortune cookies. Besides, his treasures were all gone, seized by the Ministry after the War. Every Galleon that belonged to the Malfoys now rested in the pockets of families who had lost loved ones to his father. Family heirlooms had been auctioned off, proceeds going to Muggleborn charities. No, Draco had nothing, and that would never change.


	27. Matches

_Entry 27_

_"Dad's having fun with the matches." ~ Fred Weasley, GOF_

**Title: Smell**

**Author: Nynayve**

"OH MERLIN! What is that smell? FRED! GEORGE! Have you two been setting off dungbombs in the house again?" Molly Weasley, in full on Wrath of Mother mode, stormed out of the kitchen to find her children.

The twins, Ron, Harry and Ginny were all seated on the carpet, bubblehead charms in place.

"No Mum, it wasn't us, we just saw Dad come out of the bathroom," Ginny replied, pointing to a sheepish Arthur just entering the room.

"I'll uh, I'll just go take care of that, then, shall I?" He vanished, and soon after, curses could be heard from his direction.

"Dad's having fun with the matches," Fred said. Everyone laughed.

* * *

**Title: Catastrophe**

**Author: IronSpockMaster**

"What's all this commotion?" boomed Ludo Bagman, staring down at the Weasley's and Harry. He laughed loudly. "Nowhere to sleep? And you want to share a tent with me?"

"Believe me, I do not want to share with you," sniffed Percy. "I would much rather share a tent with Mr Crouch."

"Well go on then!" said Bagman. "But you'll be begging me to let you in; he snores like a trooper. Why don't you have anywhere to sleep?"

"Dad's having fun with the matches," said Fred.

"He hasn't realised yet that the whole tent's burnt to the ground," added George.

* * *

**Title: The Christmas Fire**

**Author: TETRISDOG**

In the Burrow the Weasley family sat in the living room, Mrs. Weasley knitting. Fred and George throwing dungbombs at each other. Ron and Harry playing chess, and Hermione curled up reading a book next to the fireplace.

"Do you smell smoke?" Hermione asked

"The turkey!" Mrs. Weasley cried. She ran into the kitchen. "It's not the turkey," she said suspiciously "Fred, George?" her eyes narrowed.

"Not us, honestly mom, that's insulting. We could come up with something more original." They replied.

They looked outside; the shed had burst into flames.

"Dad's having fun with the matches." Fred said laughing.

* * *

**Title: Holidays at Malfoy Manor**

**Author: Shaybo**

Pansy's head snapped up. "Draco?" she asked. "Did you hear that?"

Draco didn't look up from his book. "No."

A few moments later Pansy heard it again. "I swear it sounds like someone's screaming down the hall."

"No one screams in Malfoy Manor," Draco told her. "You're hearing things."

Before Pansy could answer, something caught her eye. She saw what looked to be a small figure on fire, shrieking and running down the hallway.

Her eyes widened. "Is that the house elf?"

Draco smiled. "Dad's having fun with the matches."


	28. Buttocks

_Entry 28_

_"Who d'you know who's lost a buttock?" ~ Nymphodora Tonks to Mad-Eye Moody, OotP_

**Title: Surprises**

**Author: shaybo**

Seamus' hand connected with Lavender's ** through her skirt. Her ** felt rather pillow-y. Not that he cared.

"You're gonna love this," he growled, popping off the top of a bubbling potion. "Send you to the moon and back."

Although rather drunk, Lavender looked alarmed. "Is this going on my...?"

Seamus winked. "Yeah."

"But what if something happens?" she asked, panicking. "I can't-"

"Who d'you know who's lost a buttock?" Seamus asked, laughing. Before Lavender could reply, he lifted her skirt.

There was a pause.

"Oh."

Apparently, Lavender had lost a buttock.

* * *

**Title: Phinius Left-Cheek**

**Author: remuslives**

"Who d'you know who's lost a buttock?" Tonks asked with a laugh.

Mad-Eye pulled the old hat off his head and lowered his face solemnly. "Went by the name of Phinius Left-Cheek. Damn good wizard, aspired to be an Auror."

"Wh-what happened?" Harry asked, wide-eyed, unconsciously taking his wand out of his back pocket.

"He was training up to be an Auror, like I said. And so, he was running through an obstacle course. But, he got to a puzzle that he couldn't quite figure. In complete disregard to safety, he stuffed his wand into his back pocket. A boggart snuck up on him and scared the living daylights out of him; set off his wand. There was nothing they could do, cursed off his own right cheek."

"I had no idea," Harry stuttered, following Lupin downstairs.

"What a load of rubbish!" Tonks scoffed. "Phinius was called Left-Cheek because that's the one all of the women slapped."

"Got the wand out of his pocket, didn't it."

* * *

**Title: Constant Vigilance**

**Author: Nynayve**

"Don't stick yer wand there, boy!" Harry scrambled to remove his wand. "Good, you could lose a buttock doing that."

"Who d'you know who's lost a buttock?" Tonks asked the grizzled old man, a laugh bubbling out of her lips.

Harry, interested, watched his reaction, waiting to hear what was sure to be a good story.

He was disappointed.

"CONSTANT VIGILANCE!" Moody roared, stomping out of the room. Tonks doubled over, laughing maniacally.

"He didn't always have constant vigilance, did he?" Harry asked, bemused.

* * *

**Title: Potion**

**Author: IronSpockMaster**

"You wanna be careful," George told his brother. "You can lose a buttock doing that."

"Who do you know who's lost a buttock?" asked Fred.

"You!" said George, and he proceeded to chase his twin around the house.

They charged up the stairs of Grimmauld Place, almost knocking Mad Eye off his feet.

"Watch it!" he barked gruffly. "What are you boys playing at?"

"CONSTANT VIGILENCE!" Fred and George yelled in unison, charging away.

In the next room, Harry and Sirius guffawed with silent laughter.

"Oops," said Sirius, corking the bottle of potion of hyper activeness and winking at Harry.

* * *

**Title: The Question**

**Author: Christina-Tears**

"You can loose a buttocks doing that, lad." Mad-eye Moody told Harry, as he walked into the dinning room of Number 12.

"Haven't ya told him s'thing like that before?" Ron said, flashing bits of food as he tried to talk and eat at the same time.

"Never be to careful." The paranoid man told the redhead, flashing his large fake eye around the large kitchen that was starting to fill up.

"Who d'you know who's lost a buttocks?" Tonks said, coming up behind Remus, shocking him so that he would have almost choked had Ron not patted him ruffly on the back.

"Merlin! How did you do that?" Ron said in aw. "You trip over your own feet with every step you take, and you managed to sneak up on us!" Ron shook his head, shoveling more food into his mouth, making Harry wondered how he could eat so much and not be fat.

Tonks smirked, her hair flashing to bright blue, mischief dancing in her eyes. "Dear boy, when you have been alive-"

"You are not trying to impersonate Dumbledore, are you?" Sirius gave a bark of laughter, holding his stomach.

"Well at least my laugh doesn't sound like a dog barking." Tonks shot back, giving a satisfying smirk when Sirius winced.

"Is anyone ever going to answer the question?" Harry said, looking around the kitchen, whose accompaniments were all laughing.

"Guess not." He muttered, going back to his potato.


	29. Pipe Down

_Entry 29_

_"We have a better way, if you pipe down." ~ George Weasley, PoA (movie)_

**Title: ****Foreign Object**

**Author: IronSpockMaster**

"We have a better way, if you pipe down," said George, glaring at the squirming Ron.

"Stop it, guys!" Ron yelled, squirming even more. "I can do it myself! I don't want your nasty joke shop products touching my-"

"I'll have you know we worked our socks off to get these things perfect," said Fred, hurt.

"Whatever," snorted Ron. "Get off me! I can get it out myself!"

"How on earth did you get it there in the first place?" asked George.

"Harry put it there," said Ron, blushing. "I can get this wand out of my nose by myself!"

* * *

**Title: Missing**

**Author: Nynayve**

Everyone was in a panic. With young Teddy missing, the entire Weasley clan divided into pairs, and began to search for him. Just as Arthur was about to send a Patronus to tell Harry they had lost his godson, George arrived.

"Whats going on?"

"Teddy's missing!" his father said briskly, raising his wand. "I'm going to tell Harry, then try a locating spell while the others are searching the area. Molly is frantic, and Ginny is so worried that Harry will-"

"We have a better way, if you pipe down," George told his babbling father. He pulled out a device that had the Weasley's Wizard Wheezes logo on it, and held it up. "Fred came up with this, marked everyone before he died." He flipped a switch, and turned a dial, saying as he did, "Teddy Lupin!"

After just a couple of seconds, the object glowed a pale blue, and said, in a crisp, clear voice, "Teddy Lupin is upstairs, third bedroom on the left, in his crib, asleep."

Arthur turned a pale shade of red, before sending a Patronus to his wife and the searchers.

* * *

**Title: We Didn't Do It**

**Author: Christina-Tears**

"Ugh!" Fred said, shaking his head back and forth, before checking to make sure that he had gotten all of the spider webs out from his flaming locks.

"Now you see why I hate killing this damn house!" Ginny said smugly.

"Ginny!" George gasped in fake shock, holding a hand to his chest. "How could you use such language?"

"Well, I learned from the best." smiled the only Weasley girl for generations.

"FRED! GEORGE! GET DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW!" The unmistakable voice of Mrs. Weasley shouted up the staircase of Number 12.

"WE DIDN'T DO IT!" The cried in unison as soon as they reached their mother, who's mouth formed into a tight line at there words.

"I wasn't calling you down here because you did something..." She fixed them with a stern glare. "What did you do this time?"

"Nothing!"

"Honest!"

"We couldn't possible-"

"Do something to upset-"

"Our darling Mother!" They finished together, making Molly shake her head at there 'twin talk'.

"I need your help getting this room cleaned." She said, pointing to the room of to her right. "Ginny will help you." With that she walked back to the kitchen.

"Well come on. We need to get this done before dinner." Ginny said, coming up behind the red head twins. As she grabbed a dusting cloth, the twins shook their heads, and gave smirks at there little sister.

"What? I want to get this done, so I can eat dinner!"

"We have a better way, if you pipe down!" George said, just as Fred waved his wand.

Let's just say that they made it to dinner faster than Molly thought they would.

* * *

**Title: Smoking Robes**

**Author: Wizards-Pupil**

"FRED WEALEY!" Verity screamed, as Fred stepped back from the test room and into the shop with obvious alarm. George looked up from the potion he was working on and laughed as he heard an explosion occur in the other room.

Verity came running into the room, her face covered in soot and her robes smoking as she glared at Fred.

"You are bloody going to pay for that!" She screeched, her voice reaching what must have been a record breaking high as she stalked towards Fred. She waved her hands over her soot covered clothes, glaring at Fred before poking a finger into his chest.

"This is going to cost a fortune to dry clean!"

George hopped up from his seat and stepped up to the livid witch, deciding it was time to intervene and help his twin. He grabbed out his wand and pointed it at her robes.

"We have a better way, if you pipe down!" George said, waving his wand over her robes.

The shop windows rattled with her next screech.

"GEORGE WEASLEY, BRING MY CLOTHES BACK RIGHT NOW!"


	30. Harry's Head

_Entry 30_

_"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" ~ Albus Dumbledore, DH_

**Title: ****On Second Thought...**

**Author: remuslives**

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" Dumbledore asked him, smiling, arms wide.

"Er..." Harry looked around him once more. The clowns were laughing hysterically as they shoved each other into a tiny matchbox car. An elephant was wobbling dangerously, balancing on two peanuts. Three lions were chewing on a flaming hoop, while their trainer applauded. A 'magician' was pulling a crocodile out of his hat. And the ringmaster was running in circles trying to escape the bearded lady chasing him with a monkey. "Are you positive, Sir?"

Albus searched the recesses of Harry's'mind and pulled back with a squint. "Perhaps you should visit Madam Pomfrey, Harry. Just for a few days."

He led the boy out of his office and directly to the Hospital Wing.

"What's happened now?" Madam Pomfrey queried with a sigh of exasperation, observing Potter lying on one of her cots yet again.

"The boy's off his nut."

* * *

**Title: Crazy**

**Author: IronSpockMaster**

"Sir, what's happening?" asked Harry, his head spinning.

His headmaster smiled at him.

"Just sit still, Harry," he said. "You need to calm down or the potion will never take effect."

"It's all in my head!" Harry screamed. "It's not real! I'm normal, ordinary. My parents died in a car crash and there's no such person as Voldermort."

Dumbledore decided to try a different tactic to counter the Weasley twins' delusionment charm.

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?"

Those boys would get detention this time.

* * *

**Title: Imagination**

**Author: EndlessDaydreaming**

"Harry, are you alright?" Dumbledore asked worriedly, placing a gentle hand on Harry's shoulder.

Harry was standing outside the Potions classroom, eyes blinking furiously as he wiped his glasses with his robes.

"Y-yes, sir. I just saw something very...disturbing, but I think my mind's just playing tricks on me," Harry concluded, wearing his glasses. He must be imaging it. "It's just all in my head."

"Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?" Dumbledore smiled, patting Harry's shoulder and walking away, singing a tune about lemon drops.

Harry blinked some more.

How can Snape shagging Ron in the Potions room be real?


	31. Ear Wax

_Entry 31_

_"Alas! Ear Wax!" ~ Albus Dumbledore, SS/PS_

**Author: **remuslives

**Title: **Aging Gracefully

Minerva looked into the mirror, examining her aging skin with a twinge of sadness; in her youth, she had been so attractive. Where had the time gone? She sighed for time gone by and continued to brush her teeth furiously, terrified that they would fall out, as her great-grandmother's had when she was the same age. She gargled a bit of mouthwash for fresh breath and stared at herself.

She adjusted the straps on her negligee, not sure that she could still carry it off. Her hair lay loose over her shoulders, framing her face rather pleasantly. Minerva afforded herself a half grin, it was as good as it was going to get. Beside her, Albus stood cleaning his ears yet again with the little cotton swabs.

"Alas! Ear wax!"

She looked over at him, eyebrow up. "What exactly did you expect to find in there?"

"In my youth, I once discovered a gummy bear. I suspect Aberforth may have planted it there while I slept, but one can never be sure." He tipped his head back, examining up his nostrils.

Suddenly, she felt much more confident about herself. Grabbing a handfull of her lover's behind, she chased him to their bedroom, locking the door behind them, lest any ill-timed students happened by.

* * *

**Author: **IronSpockMaster

**Title: **Mischief

"Alas! Earwax!" exclaimed Albus Dumbledore, spitting the bertie bott bean rather ungracefully onto the floor. "Not again!"

Minerva looked at him with distaste.

"I hope you're planning on cleaning that up," she said, sniffing.

"Oh no," said Dumbledore, his blue eyes twinkling. "I think that task will go to the jokers who performed this trick."

Minerva heard a giggle from behind her. She spun around but there was no one there. Before she could question Albus, she realised for herself who it was.

"Yes, I think that is a wonderful idea," she replied.

The twins groaned from their hiding place.

* * *

_A/N: Think you could do better? Come to the Twin Exchange forum, the Dribble Drabble thread and give your best drabble to the current quote._


	32. Name

_Entry 31_

_"You dare speak his name?" Bellatrix LeStrange, OotP_

**Author: **Ember Nickle

**Title: **Another Pint

"My lord!" Bellatrix exclaimed. "It's broken already! I shall teach someone a lesson!"

Fifteen minutes later, she had not Apparated back.

Voldemort called for Snape. "Go quietly. Do not detain anyone unless you are absolutely certain you can. I wish only to find out what happened to Bellatrix."

Snape returned five minutes later, maimed body in tow. "If she awakes, she will recognize the dangers of overvigilance," he summarized.

"What? She set up the Taboo, yes?"

"Yes. Which worked wonderfully for ten minutes, until some drunkard at the Leaky asked Tom for another pint..."

* * *

**Author: **IronSpockMaster

**Title: **Voice Trickery

"You dare speak his name?"

Harry spun round, trying to spot who had hissed at him.

There was a snicker.

He spun again, still searching.

"We'll find you, Potter," another voice hissed. Although, it was sounding more masculine.

"Who's there?" he called, his voice shaking.

"You can't hide!"

Definitely more masculine. And he recognised it as well.

"Boo!" yelled the twins, bursting out of the cupboard.

Harry jumped. Then he glared.

"Don't. Do. That. Ever. Again!" he shouted, lunging furiously at Fred, or was it George. Whoever it was easily ducked out of the way.

"A little hormonal, are we?"

* * *

**Author: **Wizards-Pupil

**Title: **Polyjuice

"Does this look right?" Hermione asked Ron, stepping out of the room Bill and Fleur had so graciously lent her. She had just drank the poly juice potion and was now wearing Bellatrix's black robes. Harry and Ron both looked her up and down, a visible shudder going through Harry.

"It sounds so weird to hear your voice coming from her face." Harry declared, wrinkling his nose in distaste.

"Yeah, try sounding more like Bellatrix."

"You dare speak his name?" Hermione snarled, her voice exactly like the crazed witch. Ron jumped back at the sound of it and Harry tripped on the sofa. "Is that better?" She asked a moment later, her voice innocent, sweet, and her own again. Ron swallowed thickly and nodded his head.

"Yeah, brilliant."

* * *

**Author: **Sika-chan

**Title: **

"You dare speak his name?" screeched Bellatrix, "You dare speak the name of the Dark Lord? His name, which can only fall from the most worthy of lips? The name of the Dark Lord, who the very mention of strikes fear deep into even the most brave of heart, even Dumbledore fear's his name!"

"Well actually-" started Fred.

"You, scum of the earth, aren't even worthy to even be in the same universe as He!"

"Wow her small brain actually has the capacity to know of the universe," mumbled Hermione.

"Now you dare insult the family of His most deserving respect! You impudent fools! I shall rid this world of you- you- ARGH!" giving up she pionted her wand at the two.

Fred and Hermione looked at each other and said simultaneously, "Bed trouble."

Bellatrix's eyes went wide. "How did you know?"

* * *

_A/N: Think you could do better? Come to the Twin Exchange forum, the Dribble Drabble thread and give your best drabble to the current quote._


	33. Read

_Entry 33_

_"Aren't you ever going to read _Hogwarts, A History_?" - Hermione Granger, GoF_

**Author: The Dragons-Secret**

**Title: Offspring**

The hall was silent for a moment as they saw who was sitting at the Gryffindor Table.

"What are you doing here?" Hermione's voice echoed.

"Nothing . . ." They said in a voice that suggested different.

"How did you get here? The Hogwarts Express has broken down."

"Honestly, Hermione, they apparated . . . Hah! And they call you the smartest witch of your age!" Ron Weasley said, proving his stupidity once more.

"Aren't you ever going to readHogwarts, A History? You can't apparate in! You can't have taken the Hippogriff either - he's hurt his leg . . the flying car is in for repairs . . Durmstrang would not lend you their boat."

Harry and Ron slumped in their chairs. Hermione looked over at the twins who were now eating a large steak each. She had to know how they got in. An idea popped into her head as she stepped forward.

"Fred . . ." She said in a husky tone, tickling him with her warm breath. She butterfly kissed his jaw.

"How did you get here?"

His resolve was breaking . . .she could tell. He never got a chance to answer because the door slammed open.

Hagrid entered, burns all over his clothing.

"Norberta's still a feisty one!"

* * *

**Author: PenBeatsSword**

**Title: ****Snogwarts**

Fred and George sat in their usual seats in the common room, talking excitedly to their best friend, Lee Jordan. Harry and Ron were playing wizard chess, while Hermione tried, and failed, to peacefully read her book.

"Will you three shut up? Some people are trying to read!" snapped the bushy haired girl, glaring at the boys. They looked up from their conversation.

"This happens to be important, Granger. Tomorrow is the day we come of age, so we finally get to use magic outside of school," said Fred.

"So to celebrate, we'll use magic-" George started.

"To do everything-" continued Fred.

"All day!" ended George. Ron stared at his elder brothers.

"You're going to use magic to do _everything_? Including getting places? Are you going to Apparate?" he asked.

"Aren't you ever going to read _Hogwarts, A History_?" asked Hermione, exasperatedly.

"No, that's your thing. Being the smartest. And hottest," Ron winked. Hermione blushed.

"You're hot, too. I've been wondering how you felt about me," she murmured, looking down at her book. Ron stood up, pushed the book away, and began snogging Hermione ferociously. The other four boys eyes' widened.

"That was..." Fred said, weakly, at a loss for words.

"Unexpected," supplied George, gawking at the two.

"I must have missed the memo. I wasn't aware we were now at Snogwarts," joked Fred.

* * *

**Author: KayDee-DesignerExtraordinare**

**Title: ****The Professor's Wonder How**

The trio sat at the head table, looking down over the new students arriving for their first year at Hogwarts.

"How do you reckon they got here?" Harry asked.

"Ron contemplated his answer. "Well, the trains broken. You reckon they apparated?"

"They're 11, Ron."

"Oh. Yeah. You reckon they flew?" Ron asked Hermione.

"Aren't you ever going to readHogwarts, A History?"

"That book's still here?" Harry responded incredulously.

"Yes, and you can't apparate or fly into Hogwarts."

"Oh." They were quiet.

Ron gasped. "You reckon Durmstrang brought them in?"

* * *

_A/N: Think you could do better? Come to the Twin Exchange forum, the Dribble Drabble thread and give your best drabble to the current quote._


	34. Dash

_Entry 34_

_"Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash." ~ Molly Weasley, OotP_

**Author: Eusebius**

**Title: ****Frog Spawn**

Harry stood in the drawing room of 12 Grimmauld Place, attempting to process the fact that he was covered in frog spawn.

"Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash," Mrs. Weasleysaid, making hastily for the door.

Hermione and Ron looked at Harry rather sheepishly. "…Happy Birthday?" Ron ventured tentatively.

Harry broke into a grin, before walking over to Ron and giving him a big, manly hug. "Thanks, Ron," he said, sharing the sticky substance with his friend.

Ron pulled a large handful of frog spawn out of his hair, and asked, "Where's the cake?"

* * *

**Author: Michief Managed 1998**

**Title: ****Revenge**

"Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash." said Molly.

As soon as the bright green flames of floo powder disappeared, a voice rang through Grimmauld Place.

"WHY IN MERLIN'S NAME AM I GOING TO BE SHARING A ROOM WITH DRACO MALFOY?"

Hermione shot him a guilty glance, while Ron just stared at his feet.

"WHY?"

"Harry, we tried-"

"It's a long story-"

"I'm so sorry, Harry-"

"But mate, look on the bright side. Now we'll be able to get him back for past 5 years. I'll help after all that bloody bastard's done..."

After several moments of contemplative silence a mischievous grin broke out on Harry's face.

"FRED! GEORGE! GET DOWN HERE!" Harry hollered.

"Oh no.." said Hermione weakly.

* * *

**Author: PenBeatsSword**

**Title: ****Test Dummies**

"Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash," said Molly, bustling past Fred, George, and Bill, and stepping into the Floo.

"So let me get this straight," Harry said, "we've got to test every single product here by tomorrow?"

"Yeah, that pretty much sums it up," Ron said, grinning. Hermione just rolled her eyes and leaned her head against his shoulder.

"No, that does not, Ronald. Honestly. We've just got to test one of each type of products, to check if they're still working. Fred and George thought it would be funny to announce through the Prophet that Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes is reopening tomorrow, and we have to sort the working from the nonworking so they can do so," explained Hermione.

"Fred, George, did it ever occur to do this yourselves?" asked Harry exasperatedly, shooting annoyed looks at the ginger twins.

"Aw, but Harry," started Fred, putting his arm around Harry's shoulder.

"It wouldn't be as much fun without you," finished George, mirroring his brother. Harry shook off their arms and walked over to the piles of products.

"Let's start, then," he sighed.

* * *

**Author: Doesanyonegiveanf-aboutchickens**

**Title: The Flowerpot**

"Ron and Hermione will explain everything, dear, I've really got to dash." Said Mrs Weasley; quite flustered, her usually beaming smile had been replaced by pursed lips as she squelched out of the room.

Harry raised an eyebrow, and looked down at his feet, which were submerged up to his ankles in florescent green slime.

"It was an accident mate, there was this flowerpot..." Ron trailed off awkwardly.

"So it filled our room with-" Harry said hotly, cut off by a loud squelching, as Hermione emerged from the epicentre of the slime explosion; covered head to foot with gunge. Harry's mouth fell open in shock, and he gave Ron an apprehensive look.

There was a loud crack, and an exclamation of horror as both Fred and George apparated into the two boys shared room.

"What the-?" Both twins groaned as their trainers became submerged in goo.

"I told you Ronald, I told you not to touch that pot!" Hermione shrieked shrilly, she was almost completely invisible against the wall, so it looked like it had a bodiless voice.

George grinned, "Who knew green goo was such a turn on." He winked.

* * *

_A/N: Think you could do better? Come to the Twin Exchange forum, the Dribble Drabble thread and give your best drabble to the current quote._


	35. Troll

_Entry 34_

_"Troll- in the dungeons" -Professor Quirrel, SS/PS_

**Author: Doesanyonegiveaf-aboutchickens**

**Title: ****A Bet**

"Troll- in the dungeons!" Quirrel squeaked in terror.

The Great Hall went silent for a time before Severus gave Dumbledore an apologetic shrug of his shoulders.

"I lost a bet with Filius." He whispered, slouching down in his chair to cover his mortification.

Flitwick who was propped up by many cushions on his own seat, waggled his eyebrows significantly at Severus.

"Well, Severus... I suggest you go and deal with the problem before another creature is subjected to Filius' amorous desires," Dumbledore said severely, scrutinising the Potions Master. "Or rather you are."

"Yes, Headmaster," Snape conceded, thoroughly chastised.

He pushed back his chair and began to waddle painfully towards the dungeons.

Filius merely giggled, before returning his attention to a large portion of chicken and mushroom pie. "Mmm, delicious," was all he said.

* * *

**Author: IronSpockMaster**

**Title: ****Practical Joke**

"Troll- in the dungeons!" screamed Quirrel, his turban flapping loosely around his head.

"Not another one," muttered Ron, spooning a couple more mouthfuls of fruit pie into his mouth, knowing that soon they'd all be evacuated from the Great Hall and he wouldn't get to finish.

"Saw it with my own eyes," murmured Quirrel, fixing his turban with shaking fingers. "Right in front of me. Huge thing. Monstrous thing."

There was a stifled giggle from further down the Gryffindor table. Ron glanced towards the sound to see Fred and George laughing into their food.

It was fun tormenting the teachers.

* * *

_A/N: Think you could do better? Come to the Twin Exchange forum, the Dribble Drabble thread and give your best drabble to the current quote._


	36. Centaur

Entry_ 36_

_"Never try an' get a staight answer out of a centaur." ~ R. Hagrid, SS/PS_

**Author: Silksteel**

**Title: So wrong**

'And when I asked Firenze to please give my trousers back, he told me the collusion of a pale moon and Uranus was a portent of coming rapture,' Ron told them later that night, making a valliant effort to ingest one of Hagrid's rock cakes.

There was silence from Harry and Hermione, who'd both clapped their hands over their mouths and were turning puce.

'Never try an' get a straight answer out of a centaur,' Hagrid said wisely, stoking the fire.

Hermione let out a squeak and fell sideways onto Harry's shoulder, shaking with silent laughter.


	37. Waste of Space

_Entry 27_

_"I don't think you're a waste of space." ~ Dudley Dursley, DH_

**Author: aaliona**

**Title: Nothing Lost**

"I don't think you're a waste of space," Dudley admitted, glancing around at the people gathered in the room.

Petunia started to sniffle, but Harry just looked at him strangely. "Even though I'm in your spare bedroom?"

Dudley snorted. "Of course not. After all, I can still use it ten months of the year."

* * *

**Author: ****JoeCool989**

**Title: Meaning**

"I don't think your a waste of space," Dudley said reluctantly.

Harry turned around hesitantly. "You don't?"

Dudley glanced around nervously, eyeing his parents. The two Dursleys had scowls on their faces as if to warn Dudley that he was about to make a huge mistake.

The pudgy boy gulped and then returned his gaze to Harry. He put on a sneer. "Not anymore. Why would I when I'll never have to see you again?"

Harry was unaffected however. He knew that this was not what Dudley meant to say, but it was still okay. He had much more important things to worry over.


	38. Come Play

Entry_ 38_

_"Come out, come out, Peter! Come out and play!" ~ Sirius Black, PoA (movie)_

**Author: **aaliona

**Title: **Special Privilage

"Come out, come out, Peter! Come out and play!" Sirius called, jumping around a corner.

Peter crouched down in his rat form, hiding under a table. Sirius would never hide him like this. As he peered around the corner, a large black paw slammed into him from behind. He tumbled head over heels as he transfigured back into a human.

"That's not fair, Sirius!" he protested. "You can't use your animagus form."

"Well you cheated first, so we're even."

"He's got you there," Remus said, popping out.

Sirius winked at the werewolf. "Those who agree get special treatment later."


	39. My Sweetheart

_Entry 39-_

_"Have you ever let it slip that you'd like to go out in public with the words 'My Sweetheart' round your neck?" ~ Harry Potter, HBP_

**Author: **aaliona

**Title: **Drunken Words

"Harry, you need to help me!" Ron cried as he flooed into Harry's den. He yanked down the collar of his turtleneck, exposing two words sprawled across his collar bone.

"I went to a bar with Luna," he explained. "When I woke up, I was in the backroom of a tattoo parlor."

"My sweetheart?" Harry started laughing, although Ron's glaring quickly stifled it. "I'm sorry, but why? Have you ever let it slip that you'd like to go out in public with the words 'my sweetheart' round your neck?"

"No, and you don't even want to know what it says on my left cheek."

* * *

**Author: **AllShadesOfGrey

**Title: **Custom Made Jewelry

Harry stifled a laugh as Ron walked into the common room. "What are you wearing?" Harry spluttered.

"Oh, this?" Ron looked around the room nonchalantly. He leaned in and whispered, "Lavender gave it to me. It's lovely, isn't it?" He sighed, fingering the large, swirly script.

"You, erm, like it?" Harry said hesitantly.

Ron nodded vigorously. "Of course!"

The pink necklace clashed horribly with his hair.

"Have you ever let it slip that you'd like to go out in public with the words 'My Sweetheart' round your neck?" Harry said with a raised eyebrow.

"I know what I'm doing, Harry. And plus, I designed it! Lavender paid," Ron said proudly.

Harry merely looked disgusted. "Excuse me?"

"It's a secret, shh." Ron said, whispering conspiratorially.

"Ah," replied Harry, turning back to his Potions essay. Even Potions was favorable to hearing Ron prattle on about custom made, gaudy, pink, girly, sparkly jewelry.

* * *

**Author: **Lifedrops

**Title: **Payback

"GEORGE FABIAN WEASLEY YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"A disgruntled Ron entered the kitchen, clutching his neck, where a collar with a pink frilly heart and the words 'My Sweetheart' was hanging innocently.

George looked up and burst into laughter.

"Whoever did this must be a genious!"

Percy's smirk went unnoticed.

"Have you ever let it slip that you'd go in public with the words 'My Sweetheart' round your neck?" asked Harry.

"Well, I was talking about that horrid necklace Lavender bought me to Pe...PERCIVAL IGNATIUS WEASLEY YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!"

George awww'ed and wiped a fake tear.

"My baby Percy...All grown up! First he cracks a joke and now this? Oh my precious Percy-poo!"

The room howled with laughter. Another typical Weasley breakfast...


	40. War

_Entry 40~_

_"Oi! There's a war going on here!" Harry Potter, DH_

__**Author:** Jack of the North

The snow flew in every direction, kicked up by the combined efforts of the wind and the guests of the Weasley's Christmas lunch. As the wind reached its peak, only six people remained in the snowball fight. Harry, Hermione and Sirius on one side, the twins and Tonks on the other. The snowballs were being charmed to fly at specific people and with a call of, "Now!" from Fred, Hermione found herself being pelted with a dozen balls at once.

"Are you alright?" Sirius demanded, rushing to her side. But she was fine, laughing as she sent her own barrage to the trio on the other side of the garden.

"You are so beautiful," Sirius said, wrapping his large arms around her and kissing her bright red nose.

"Oi! There's a war going on here!" Harry called to them just before a drift of snow was dumped on him and the opposing team declared themselves the victors.

* * *

**Author: **Montley

"Oi! There's a war going on here!" Harry yelled, alerting everyone in the common room.

"You pick your nose," Fred challenged.

"You sleep with a teddy bear," George countered viciously. Fred jumped on top of George, tackling him to the ground and they began wrestling, throwing punches at each other. It wouldn't end, and people were found yelling either one of the twins names. Hermione walked towards them and pulled them up by their ears like they were her own children. They were groaning and yelling ow at her but she would not let go of them.

"I'll write a letter to your mum if you don't tell me what's going on here," Hermione said to them.

Both of them gulped and exchanged glances with each other.

Then Fred said, "He tried to take the last cookie."


	41. Not Seeing You

_Entry 40~_

_"We won't be seeing you,"_ Fred Weasley

_"Yeah, don't bother to keep in touch,"_ George Weasley

**Author: aaliona**

**Title:**** Small Habits**

Hermione flinched as loud footsteps echoed down the stairs. She curled up to make herself as small and unseen as possible as her flatmate escorted two men to the door.

"This is the last straw!" Angelina hissed. "We are not going to play these games anymore, so don't try saying sorry this time!"

"You don't have to fly off the handle," Fred said, but she pointed her wand at his throat.

"Zip it, you!"

"Fine," Fred replied as he turned up his nose. "We won't be seeing you again."

"Yeah," George added, "don't bother to keep in touch."

Angelina apparently did not plan to, as she slammed the door in their faces. With a heavy sigh, she plodded over to the couch.

"What did they do?" Hermione asked timidly.

Narrowing her eyes, Angelina said, "Same as last week."

Hermione bit her lip and replied, "Sorry."

"Don't be," Angelina sighed. "You can't help it if Fred likes to say your name."

* * *

**Author:** **laeeyore93**

**Title:** **Returning**

It was 18 months since she'd left, and she was nervous about returning. She wasn't sure how people would react to her sudden reappearance, though she was looking forward to seeing everyone. Well, most everyone.

She knew she should have stayed for _him_. That_ he_ had needed her. But after the last funeral all she could think about was getting away.

Thoughts of what could be awaiting her ran through her mind as she apparated to The Burrow. She hoped Molly would be the first person she saw, though as long as it wasn't _him_ she wasn't sure she cared.

Unfortunately luck was not on her side, and _his_ face was the first to greet her.

"Yeah, don't bother to keep in touch. Then show up at our door after a year and a half." He said as he looked her over.

"Sorry George," she quietly replied, "I just couldn't stay after the war."

"I know Hermione," George whispered back as he drew her in for a tight hug, "I know."

* * *

**A/N: Think you can do better? Visit our forum and give it a try.**


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